It is often said that the way to happiness is to do what you dream of. Well, can it be the source of your unhappiness to think that the road to happiness is through your dreams?
It should be said from the beginning, this article may sound harsh, but this article was written not to discourage anyone, but to offer a different perspective. Although it is useful to dream and take a break from reality and wander around in the world of dreams; We should not forget that every dream that we cannot fulfill in life is a burden that pulls us to the bottom. This is exactly why listening to Ryan Holiday’s advice can at least move us forward in more realistic and goal-oriented thinking. The story he tells on his YouTube channel highlights why we shouldn’t be in a hurry to make our dreams come true and that dreams can sometimes be deceiving:
“I got my first offer to write a book when I was 22 or 23. Someone who read my blog post made me an offer to turn it into a book. After telling my mentor, friend, and boss Robert Greene about my dream of becoming a writer, he told me: “Ready. “You’re not, turn down the offer.”
Maybe someone who has adopted the motto of “just follow your dreams” would start this business without questioning himself in the first place. But bigger things can happen when your priorities and strengths don’t get in the way of your dreams.
“I trusted him and turned down the offer. When I was ready, 3 years later I wrote my first book on a completely different topic. A few years later, I wrote the book that I rejected the offer to publish. That book has now sold over 300,000 copies and has been translated into more than 20 languages. If I hadn’t listened, I would have tried to write this book before I was ready, and I probably wouldn’t have succeeded because I thought I was inadequate.”
When Lenard McKelvey (Charlamagne Tha God) was a young radio host with dreams about a career in music, he had a similar reaction when he told his mentor about his music career:
“You can’t build on empty dreams. A musical career is not for you in line with your talents.”
You might think that McKelvey would remember his promise to never let anyone kill his dreams when he heard this. But he had heard objectively what he needed to hear. McKelvey left his music career and went on top of his strengths and turned to only radio presenting. Currently one of the most listened radio presenters in the world.
What Can Be Done Instead of Chasing Dreams?
Sometimes we can encourage the people around us and ourselves to follow our dreams without giving enough thought. The best thing to do is to be able to say “forget your dreams” sometimes. In this way, you can create a more objective and development-oriented perspective.
This is not about killing the potential within you. It’s about diagnosing the disease and doing something about it before it’s too late, while you still have time.
That’s why we need people in our lives who tell us the truth without hesitation, and who we can sometimes say “forget about your dreams”.
We must be who we can be, knowing ourselves, our potential, and our limits; Not the person we think we’re going to be. Focusing on our strengths instead of dreams may bring greater success and happiness.
“We are the sum of what we achieve, not what we dream of.”
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